Thursday, June 28, 2007

I just want to trade

When my kids were babies and in pain and cried and couldn't tell me where it hurt, I prayed for relief for them.

"God, take away her pain. Give it to me. I can take it. She doesn't deserve it."

Moms, Dads, you know that prayer. If you've raised your children beyond their early years and into their teens, the desire to take away their pain has not diminished. You want comfort for your kids even if it that means torture for you. When your kids hurt, you hurt. When your kids hurt, you don't feel relief until your child feels relief. No matter what your kids do, you don't want pain for them. You want your kid to live in a universe void of cause and effect, justice, or consequences.

Today my child faced a judge and her child was taken from her permanently. My child's young life is devastated beyond anything I can even describe.

She told me she doesn't want to be a grown up anymore. And my heart hurts so hard. And I want I could trade places with her.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope."
- Jeremiah 29:11


Vicki Unanan

Unknown said...

I'm sending a big hug to Charity. Please give her one for me. We all know that she is Ali's mom and and in her heart she is Ali's mom and nothing a judge can say will take that away from her. I love you all and keep you in my prayers everyday. Darlene

Anonymous said...

What exactly does that mean? Do you and Susan have full custody now? Does she have visitation? I know Charity's heart must be broken. Psalm 71 for Charity. God will rescue her!

Anonymous said...

The great thing about our God is that He is a Redeemer, able to take the worst situation possible and bring something beautiful out of it. It may not seem possible now, but He will be faithful to do it.
Charity is in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

O Lord, please come in like a flood and minister to Charity...I pray that she will cling to you in the midst of this heartbreak. That you would build in her that testimony of your grace and glory....Bless her and surround her today, I thank you Jesus that you will not waste anything. Please continue to uplift this family and hold them so close to you... We praise You mighty Lord, we love You Jesus :)

Bryonm said...

Michele:

My wife Susan is Ali's primary care-giver. That is sort of like a foster parent, but not quite. Ali is a ward of the state of California. In October, there will be another hearing where Charity's parental rights will be permanently terminated. Basically, the judge told her that this was going to happen in October and Ali will be available for adoption.

The process is all very painful and confusing.

Anonymous said...

Bryon--Thanks for trying to explain. I am praying hard and waiting for the day you can look back on this and see how God was working through it all.

I hope you don't mind my asking the following questions: Did the judge give Charity any options or recommendations, such as parenting classes, etc? Have you received any legal counsel? Is money an issue?

Anonymous said...

I'm soooo sad for Charity, but God is not dead; He is still on the throne and in the business of restoration. All things are possible with Him, and as long as there is breath there is hope.
Loving you,
Joyce

Bryonm said...

Michele:

All those options were looked at and are not options for Charity right now.

Charity has legal counsel. Everyone, including Charity, agrees that Ali should be in our care and that's the course we're pursuing...

Unknown said...

I'm praying even harder for you guys! I'm so sorry to hear of the judge's ruling, I pray for Charity through this time. I pray for all of you to get through this. I don't mean to pry, but if she's up for adoption in October, surely family would have priority to keep her right? Especially with Susan being her care-giver now...I sure don't understand the way they think things work.

Anonymous said...

I really hear the grief you all are in, and my heart aches for you. As I glanced at the first comment, from Vicki H., I had to say, "Amen! So be it, Lord!" Somehow, in ways known only to Him, and in ways only He can manage, He will work all of this out for Ali's good, for yours and Susan's, and for Charity's.

And I know that doesn't ease the pain, right now. I'm so sorry.

Carole Turner said...

I read your life knowing I will cry but I also know I will pray. My heart breaks with you all. I feel the pressure in my chest as I picture your daughter in such great pain and feeling like she has failed everyone. I will pray for her. I will pray for you and everyone involved. God will use this.

Bryonm said...

Feath:

Thanks...

Unknown said...

Don't know if you got our e- mail on this, but we kind of feel your pain. Jacquelyn has now had a run in with the police and is diplaying some very self destructive behavior. OUr hearts are broken over it. Thanks for writing about your experience, it really helps ME! We want to be a blessing to YOU, but you are really ministering to me. The post on your bible study about forgiveness is great too. Love, Bob and Candi